Train a Child

I was so angry. Furious, I screamed and I cried. I stomped on the floor. I ripped my sheets off the bed. I kicked a ball across my room. Then for a moment I stopped and heard a “click” down the hall. I ran to the door and found it locked. “You can’t do this! I’ll get out!” I pounded on the door and all I heard was one sentence, “You can come out when you’ve calmed down.” I gave the door a kick and sat down. I don’t even remember what I was upset about but to this day my moms words still stick to me, “I hope someday you have a child like you.” What if someday I have a child like me? Will I be level headed enough to train a child even in the middle of their tantrum?

Proverbs 13:24 tells us love carefully disciplines. “He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.” At first glance that may seem pretty harsh. No rod means you hate them – love means you discipline them. Keep in mind that it says love CAREFULLY disciplines! Discipline is fair, fitting, and upholds the child’s dignity. It is not unfair, extreme, and degrading. Discipline used in the correct way leads to respect for parents, teachers, pastors, and even God. Training and discipline go hand in hand and they need to be adjusted according to each child’s need. My children are a lot like me. There are times I get to model level headed patient discipline by removing them when they are flailing on the floor. There are also times I remember sins of my youth and sins as a dad and confess “daddy didn’t handle that correctly.” I think both are extremely important for my children to witness because both give me opportunities to talk about God’s relationship to us, and our sins and His forgiveness. Jesus didn’t come to save perfect people but he came for us.

I’m curious to hear what other parents are doing to “carefully discipline” and “patiently parent”. What do you do? Any good stories? What part of discipline is challenging for you?

-Pastor Eric Hansen, Discipleship Pastor